Parenting Tip of the Week: 3 Magic Words
This week’s tip is a phrase we’ve learned along the way that can turn a confrontation into a conversation. So often as parents we find ourselves frustrated or at least concerned about something our child has done. This is especially effective when your kids reach the coaching years (teenage), these three magic words can provide just enough buffer to allow your child to respond rather than react. Those three words are… “I’m just wondering”. For instance, your 15 year old son, for the third time in a row, leaves their backpack on the kitchen counter after you’ve asked them nicely not to. Normally, we might say, “Why do you keep leaving your backpack on the counter?!” Try instead, “I’m just wondering, why is it that you keep leaving your backpack on the counter?” You’ll be amazed at how those three simple words can often turn a defensive reaction into a thoughtful response. Try it!
Parenting Resource of the Week: Culture Translator
This might be confusing, so let me explain. We are Axis Ministries (AxisMinistries.org). When we started there was an organization Axis (Axis.org), that did events and training for teenagers. They have also added parent training and resources along the way. They are an outstanding resource, especially when you are a parent trying to understand a changing teenage culture. If you have teenagers, check out the Culture Translator, a weekly email designed to keep you up on all the latest trends in teenage culture.
Dani’s Digs ~ Parenting Product of the Week: Infantino
I try to stay on topic each week if I can, but I’m not going to lie, I get excited when there is not a specific product that ties with the week’s podcasts. That’s because it allows me to share a random product that I just love!! So this week, I am excited to share my baby food pouch system! If you are a mom like me then you are always on the go. Meaning meals can get a little tricky with little ones. So this Infantino squeeze station is awesome! The on the go organic packets that you can buy at the store are awesome too, but they can get pricey. With these you can make all your own food packets with any of your own ingredients. Then you just freeze or refrigerate them for on the go! I even make smoothie ones now for my five year old.
They’ve both been involved with Young Life and have each been on staff at varying times. Currently Jamie is the Young Life Director of Women’s Engagement and Philanthropy while Scott serves as Head of School at Providence a Santa Barbara Christian School.
Favorite Verse or Quote – 2 Timothy 1:7 for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.
Manage yourself so no one else has to. ~ John Wooden
Parenting Failure – Early on an incident when their oldest was three or four. In a moment of frustration and impatience, Jamie hit his foot because he wouldn’t hold still. While similar things would happen again, it was a sobering moment for her at the time of how impatient she was in that moment.
Parenting Ah-ha Moment – When the oldest went into high school and began playing water polo. They found themselves overwhelmed with school schedules, practices, games, extra turnouts… wondering if this was now their life. They made an intentional decision to push against all of that and to lean into family. Even if it meant they were going to eat dinner at 7:30 or 8:00, they were determined to maintain the things that made them family.
Proudest Parenting Moment – a moment when one of their sons (Tyler) at 6 years old, really showed his heart of kindness by praying for a kid that was having a tough time.
One thing you are excited about in this season – Really excited for the times when their adult children call home and want to talk to mom and dad.
Lightning round – Greatest fear – was going to raise a bunch of Pharisees – Best advice – (from a marriage ceremony) Have a marriage centered family… as opposed to a child centered family – One of your personal habits that contributes to your success – do-overs – Parenting book – Shepherding Your Child’s Heart.
One thing they would do differently – Keep the long view… teach the guys about money.
Top 3 Priorities for parenting – 1) Presence 2) Be very intentional (family time, rites of passage) 3) Commit to transparency (live authentically)